Ulysses S. Claus or Santa, Whips, and Chains

For the first time in weeks we had real food and a great turnout for Thursday Night. In addition to the usual suspects, the TNIs were joined by Santa – and he went for a dive. Santa was delivered to Willow last Thursday by Paul Miller. I'm not sure where Paul got Santa, but since it's only August, it's safe to assume he didn't steal it from a nativity scene at the local church. (Hmmm. The good nativity scenes have sheep, shepherds, one virgin, and a Santa). Since Paul wasn't able to come tonight, the rest of the TNIs took over. After keeping Santa in custody for the last week, Gerhard, Kulp, Colin, Kat, the always effervescent Huck, and I chained the big guy, threw him in the water, and then dragged his sad ass around the quarry until we found a suitable resting place for him. With Huck illuminating Santa from the inside, the big guy literally glowed as he sailed with the TNIs down the railroad tracks. It looked like the Macy's Day Parade after dining on shrooms. Where, you may ask, is Santa resting? One hint: Ulysses. Go find him. With Santa secured, we inadvertently broke into smaller groups and finished our dives. Gerhard and I headed for the caboose, but we got sidetracked at Dave Balley's truck, which no longer has custody of my piece of crap lawnmower. We plopped off the hood onto the tracks that run between the corrugated pipe and the caboose. I didn't realize those tracks were that close to the truck, so I spent most of the dive trying to figure out where these tracks went. Back on the surface, we got some reluctant coals to burn after Gerhard used a scuba tank and a "doggie dick" to fan the fire. Burgers, dogs, apple pie, salad, drinks. We toasted Santa while we ate like kings.

back  |  printer-friendly version